Why have I done such a poor job of training my children in the art of putting away groceries. I spent quite a bit of time and energy guiding them through the complex process of bringing the goods in from the car. Somehow, in all the excitement I experienced with this training success, I missed the step where I teach them to put the stuff AWAY!
Now you'd think it wouldn't be that challenging for this clever crew to figure out that ice cream will MELT if you leave it on the counter, or that lunch meat will GO BAD if left out in 100 degree weather, but apparently the biology major and the clever girl thought that magic fairies swooped in and put things away while they were online and their mother was relaxing in the home spa known as the LAUNDRY ROOM. Yes, that's right, I'm washing urgently needed clothing that was not in the hamper, while the plague of grocery locusts lounge around, and then come in to find melted ice cream all over the counter.
Here's the learning curve scoop:
1. State the obvious...put away the groceries
2. Do not get sucked in by sweet little faces, hugs for mom and pleas for desperately needed items of clothing that missed the hamper! Those beasties can wash their own stuff!
3. Charge them for spoiled grocery items
4. Don't buy the ice cream- it's too fattening anyhow
You'd think I'd be just a little more clever. turns out this weekend, I'm just too tired to be a focused parent. Look out though, I'm going to bed early every night this week.
That's all from the kitchen counter!
Your Pal,
Rache Baby!
Monday, September 28, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
What's With the Name?
When my oldest son was small he was into all things Star Wars and science fiction. Somehow, I think it was after watching Mel Brooks's (yes grammar police, the apostrophe 's' IS grammatically correct) Spaceballs, he came up with his own nickname: 'Joshtar the Destroyer'- well actually, now he's almost 21 and six feet tall and he still uses said nickname. Before we knew it, all of us were 'tars': Dadtar, Momtar, Mattar, Livtar and of course, Atar- and we were all Destroyers. This comes in handy when you send your child a text with the signature 'Love, Momtar the Destroyer'.
It has stuck with me and I must say it is a great improvement over his previous nickname for me- Evil Mom. That's another story, best saved when you all have plenty of time and energy to read through something long and funny- but only to me :).
So I'm Momtar- but not the Destroyer, the Enjoyer. I think it fits, 'cause I'm a get over it gal who believes the glass is half full and that tomorrow will be better- just ask my buddy Scarlett, with a nod to my pals Barb and Geggan. Besides, kids who can 'get over it' are way more fun to hang with than Doug and Wendy Whiners!
So that's where the name comes from. 'Til the next post wherein I describe how fun it is to cook for a family of six who don't enjoy the same foods and believe they can opt for cruise style dinner seatings in their own home.
Your pal,
Rach Baby
It has stuck with me and I must say it is a great improvement over his previous nickname for me- Evil Mom. That's another story, best saved when you all have plenty of time and energy to read through something long and funny- but only to me :).
So I'm Momtar- but not the Destroyer, the Enjoyer. I think it fits, 'cause I'm a get over it gal who believes the glass is half full and that tomorrow will be better- just ask my buddy Scarlett, with a nod to my pals Barb and Geggan. Besides, kids who can 'get over it' are way more fun to hang with than Doug and Wendy Whiners!
So that's where the name comes from. 'Til the next post wherein I describe how fun it is to cook for a family of six who don't enjoy the same foods and believe they can opt for cruise style dinner seatings in their own home.
Your pal,
Rach Baby
Welcome
For those of you who may have been following my abysmal blog over on Typepad- I hope you'll give me one more shot before you kick me to the curb. Sadly, the technical difficulties overwhelmed me (see Eddie Izzard over on YouTube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6C_HjWr3Nk). Thank goodness for my boys- that college tuition is starting to pay off!
***Note: NOT all of Eddie Izzard (colorful language and sensitive topics) is for kids, preview the bit in privacy, please***
Anyhoo, here I am. So, I thought I'd start anew, as if the other blog had never existed. Cyberspace might be one of the few places I can legitimately claim a do-over. My name is Rachel Ensler, and I'm the pretty happily married (except when I'm laundering his congealed, been in the trunk of the car for a week during a California heat wave gym clothes) mom of four pretty terrific kids (unless they're surprising me with yet another pet- "Mom, tortoises really aren't any work; and besides it can live with the chickens and the rabbit").
My oldest is a college senior who still cannot seem to throw his Slurpee cup away before it permanently adheres to the dresser. My second son, a sophmore in college was sent to me by the forces of the universe to humble me; it's working, so I was thinking the universe could give me a little rest now. The third child, my very much wished for girl, is lovely. I really was hoping for a daughter, what with all the female bonding etc. However, it turns out girls are more emotional than boys, and they leave an amazing amount of hair and make up products all over the bathroom sink that they share with their three brothers. So, there are some ancillary expenses associated with the much longed fpor daughter that I hadn't anticipated. Still, she is a lot of girly fun!!
Yes! The last one is another boy- the easy going, cook his own breakfast at 4 because he's tired of waitng for his mother to remember he's hungry kind of kid. Last Sunday he turned 11. His fervently requested birthday gift? He would like his mother to please stop calling him 'Baby Aaron'. Go figure.
I've been a parenting educator since 1985, but as it turns out, having all that experience, education and training still can't prevent some pretty colossal momming blunders. So among other topics that catch my fancy, I'll be sharing my successes and FAILURES here with you all. Somehow, saying them out loud will make me feel less alone. Especially when you all say, "Wow! If the parenting expert (and we use the term loosely here) can screw up that badly, I'm doing pretty well for myself." So, I hope you'll visit from time to time, check out the stories and have a laugh at my expense- really, I don't mind, because I'll be looking in the mirror and laughing right along with you!
Your pal in the MomZone,
Rach Baby
***Note: NOT all of Eddie Izzard (colorful language and sensitive topics) is for kids, preview the bit in privacy, please***
Anyhoo, here I am. So, I thought I'd start anew, as if the other blog had never existed. Cyberspace might be one of the few places I can legitimately claim a do-over. My name is Rachel Ensler, and I'm the pretty happily married (except when I'm laundering his congealed, been in the trunk of the car for a week during a California heat wave gym clothes) mom of four pretty terrific kids (unless they're surprising me with yet another pet- "Mom, tortoises really aren't any work; and besides it can live with the chickens and the rabbit").
My oldest is a college senior who still cannot seem to throw his Slurpee cup away before it permanently adheres to the dresser. My second son, a sophmore in college was sent to me by the forces of the universe to humble me; it's working, so I was thinking the universe could give me a little rest now. The third child, my very much wished for girl, is lovely. I really was hoping for a daughter, what with all the female bonding etc. However, it turns out girls are more emotional than boys, and they leave an amazing amount of hair and make up products all over the bathroom sink that they share with their three brothers. So, there are some ancillary expenses associated with the much longed fpor daughter that I hadn't anticipated. Still, she is a lot of girly fun!!
Yes! The last one is another boy- the easy going, cook his own breakfast at 4 because he's tired of waitng for his mother to remember he's hungry kind of kid. Last Sunday he turned 11. His fervently requested birthday gift? He would like his mother to please stop calling him 'Baby Aaron'. Go figure.
I've been a parenting educator since 1985, but as it turns out, having all that experience, education and training still can't prevent some pretty colossal momming blunders. So among other topics that catch my fancy, I'll be sharing my successes and FAILURES here with you all. Somehow, saying them out loud will make me feel less alone. Especially when you all say, "Wow! If the parenting expert (and we use the term loosely here) can screw up that badly, I'm doing pretty well for myself." So, I hope you'll visit from time to time, check out the stories and have a laugh at my expense- really, I don't mind, because I'll be looking in the mirror and laughing right along with you!
Your pal in the MomZone,
Rach Baby
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